Tuesday, May 8, 2007

You Know You're A Contemporary Artist When....

1) You start using words like "context" and "juxtaposition" even when thinking.
2) You get so upset that Borders hasnt put the latest issue of Art in America or Artforum or whatever on the stand that you threaten to burn the building down!
3) You set your alarm to wake you at 4am when WJXT will air the latest episode of Art 21.
4) You start looking at things like your toenail clippings as possible art material.
5) You practice what you are going to say when you get the call by that curator asking you to be in the next Whitney Biennial.
6) Your mom says things like "I remember that lovely painting of flowers you made for me when you were 10, why dont you do things like that anymore dear?"
7) Youre not being asked to design the Jazz Fest poster or the Riverside Arts Fest logo.
8) You often goto Home Depot or Lowes for art materials, and when you cant find what you are looking for and have to ask a worker, you try your best to disguise the fact that you are an artist (like building a motorized pole with swinging monkey heads and car horns is a typical weekend home improvement project)
9) people look at you really really really really wierd
10) I mean REALLY wierd!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where'd you get that stuff Mark?

Art 21 rocks. I think it used to be called Egg The Arts show.

We have netflix and several episodes of Art 21 lined up.

Interesting you mentioned it.


Never thought I could use my toenals for art materials. I've used body hair before though.

Now I'm using this stuff called Glazecoat that Joy from Bogda told me about. It makes an acrylic coat like 20 coats thick on one poor.

Check it out.

Anonymous said...

I meant toenails.

And one pour.

Wish this thing had spellcheck.

Anonymous said...

I was pretty upset that my local Barnes & Knobles in Mandarin didn't have Art Forum a few years ago that I did go into a sort of depression after having moved from a larger city with all the Art mags.

I also got pissed when a pretty progressive book store didn't carry Adbusters.

Strange?

And yes, I have been described as weird. At first I was upset by it, and now I wear my weirdness as a badge of honor.

Awesome to find others out there with my infliction.